If you have recently lost a loved one and you can not find an outlet for the pain, we tell you some tasks that will help you to alleviate the loss
The loss of a loved one is inevitably one of the most devastating moments a person has to go through in their life. The absence of someone and the normalization of their lack is a challenge that must be faced with moderation to avoid states of depression.
Leer en español: ¿Terapia de duelo? Necesaria e indispensable
The way to experience grief is never the same from person to person, so the best way to understand it to cope is to resort to professional help. According to the portal Psychology and Mind, the goal of psychotherapy is to offer help to face and overcome the loss in a healthy way.
The tasks of mourning
According to the psychologist J. William Worden, grief is an emotional reaction given to experience a loss of all kinds; it manifests with affliction and suffering. In his book, The Treatment of Grief, Worden describes different tasks that the therapist-patient relationship should carry out when this situation arises.
The first is to accept the reality of the loss, this is where the patient is in a state of denial, which is why he will seek to deny reality or stick to the idea that death can be reversed.
At this stage, psychological help is paramount because it encourages the person to accept death not only intellectually, but emotionally. For this, it is important to talk about the loss and the situations that led to death. Where did it happen? As a step? Why did it happen?
The second important task requires working the emotions and the pain of the loss; therefore, at this stage the pain and the expression of feeling are important. Suppressing or avoiding the painful emotions that result from grief is counterproductive.
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The essential function at this moment on the part of the therapist is to help recognize and manifest the feelings associated with the pain, such as anguish, anger, guilt, loneliness, among others; all this using the stimulation of emotional intelligence.
Task three refers to how to adapt to a medium in which the deceased is no longer present, for this purpose different dimensions of life must be seen. The external ones or the daily life; the internal ones or the influence of the loss on the conception of oneself; and the spiritual or moral construct that the patient has after the situation of loss occurs.
At this time, it is important to assume a role that was not used to the development of skills that help to take on new experiences, roles and conceptions of oneself and the world.
The fourth task is to effectively relocate the deceased and continue living. The future is an approach of great relevance in the path of mourning, therefore, the projective view that pain will be relieved is something that should be remembered with the passage of time. In this way, it is necessary for the bereaved person to recognize that life goes on and that the memory of loved ones is a bond that in no way should stop the course of existence.
The therapist must "Not help the person to 'renounce' the deceased, but to find a suitable place for him in his emotional life, a place that allows him to continue to live effectively in the world," writes Worden in his book.
The importance of grief therapy
According to the portal Psychology and Mind, the purpose of grief therapy is to help restore emotional balance in a measured and calm, preventing depression or other emotional or mental disorders associated with untreated or repressed grief. This therapy is essential in the management of short and long-term experience since it stimulates the expression of feelings, the measure of longing and memories and the projection to the future.
Although mourning can suffer from other losses, such as disappointment with missed goals, love breakdowns, unemployment, etc. Mourning therapy has an objective view on the death of family members or loved ones, allowing the patient to understand the stages of the same, to feel supported, to the development of resilient affectivities and strategies for improvement.
LatinAmerican Post | Jorge Becerra
Translated from "¿Terapia de duelo? Necesaria e indispensable"
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